As promised, I took one for the team and sat through the 2021 Oscars so you didn’t have to, and let’s just say I had to throw back at least two bottles of wine, and that was just during the Red Carpet laudations from the woke entertainment media.
The underfed D-list wannabe celebs, aka entertainment reporters, were in full effect seeking sustenance in the form of attention rather than a ham sandwich. And the only way to satiate their hunger is through gushing over celebrities clad in filthy virtue-signaling cloth masks and designer dresses that cost the same as an annual grocery bill for a family of four.
I can’t wait for all the Oscars 2021 speeches touting experimental COVID shots, face diapers, and genuflecting the faux Harris/Biden presidency. It’s gonna be awesome!
Oscars 2021 pre-show/Red Carpet breakdown:
For starters, I don’t know who the hell half of these actors are or the movies for which they received their coveted nominations, but I do know that I would put my money on the Best Actor category winner as Riz Ahmed just because he’s Muslim OR Chadwick Boseman just because he’s black. This is not to say that both actors are or were not talented but that Hollywood is racist.
Other Best Actor nominations include Sir Anthony Hopkins, who recently faked getting that experimental COVID shot in his arm on social media, Steven Yeun from The Walking Dead fame, and that actor in that weird film The Fifth Element, Gary Oldman.
Best Supporting Actress nominees are more familiar and include Glenn Close, Amanda Seyfried, and some gal named Maria Bakalova who starred in a Borat film. To be fair, Glenn Close starred in the movie Hilbilly Elegy and I didn’t want to ruin the book (which was excellent) by watching the film.
An early congrats to Oscars 2021 nominated director Emerald Fennell for the first #pizzagate nod on the Red Carpet. The Promising Young Woman director couldn’t help but find a way to work pizza into a vacuous convo with Giuliana Rancic about how she’s been enjoying her current pregnancy. Kudos to Fennell for being the first to signal to all the pedophiles tuning in.
One entertainment personality known only as “Karamo” never missed an opportunity to keep the diversity machine going by pointing out nominees’ skin color and ethnicity rather than performance. In case you were wondering… that’s what racism looks like, or at least what division does. Well played, Karamo…well played.
Oscars 2021 Awards: Predictable and Vomit-Inducing Speeches
As predicted, the first two speeches focused entirely on racial oppression as its message rather than the bigger success of those films which I am guessing involved many under-payed people in production that are of other ethnicities.
Getting back to the subject of only celebrating Asians and blacks, during a tearful acceptance speech from the director of the film, Nomadland, Chloe Zhao started off as positive. This didn’t last as once again, it went back to the topic of race. In her defense, Zhao did point out that there are good people in this world to believe in again. I have to applaud her efforts, but they are falling on the deaf ears of the “woke” who remain asleep.
A jib camera took the time to capture the reaction of the film’s star and former Oscar winner, Frances McDormand. I would like to say that I could read her proud and profound reaction based on her face, but she was one of a few people wearing a face diaper so it’s anyone’s guess.
The next winners for a Live-Action Short Film Category were Martin Desmond Roe and Travon Free for the film, Two Distant Strangers which I may or may not see. Travon Free strolled up to the stage in a statement tuxedo worthy of the tackiness of a 1970s prom rental complete with gold trim and a gold bowtie. Free decided to start his acceptance speech with a dig at the police and a staggering stat that three people are killed by the police every day.
Awards for Best Normal Acceptance Speeches
One silver lining? Will McCormick’s acceptance speech for the film, If Anything Happens I Love You, included thanking his wife and the people that worked on the film with him. In the audience, his wife sat quite giddy and truly proud of his accomplishment. Bravo!
Next up on the stage were Pete Docter and Dana Murray and they had the nerve to thank their crew, family, parents, and art and history teachers for the success of their film. Granted, they both worked with the evil corporation of Disney/ABC but it took me hours to hear “normal” acceptance speeches that thanked “the little people” for their success rather than using their pulpit to preach racism and hatred.
However, one favorite and the most passionate acceptance speech was from Pippa Ehrlich. She was truly an emotional mess (which I loved) over a documentary about a cephalopod in her co-produced film, My Octopus Teacher.
Korean actress Yuh-Jung Youn stole the show and the award Best Actress in a Supporting Role. Her heartfelt speech was the only redeeming one that evening and might give me hope in humanity again. She poked fun at herself for other’s mispronunciations of her name and even made a humbling statement and shoutout to her fellow nominated actresses. Now that’s a class act.
On to the biggest Oscars 2021 shockers… Sir Anthony Hopkins went on to win Best Actor for his role in The Father. The octogenarian actor decided to skip his acceptance speech for reasons that might be related to his white privilege or senility. Either way, I was relieved to get to bed a bit earlier and was tired of this snooze-inducing program.
Following this Oscars’ upset was Frances McDormand’s win for Best Actress for her role in Nomadland. McDormand finally removed that stupid face diaper long enough to deliver a wolf call and to remind us that we should live our lives once again in the near future by going to a movie theater to see these films. Gee, thanks for your permission.
The last and most coveted award for Best Picture was for…..Nomadland. By this point, I was so bored that I didn’t care. And that’s what these celebs don’t get…nobody cares about your hate-inciting speeches or cop-bashing views. We tune in for the glitz and glam. All of which we were robbed of again as you continued to social distance, wear face diapers, and make the entire Oscars experience strange.
I think the Academy owes a gold statue to Ricky Gervais for his trolling of this dull affair. The comedian delivered some zingers via his Twitter account and provided far more entertainment than every actor attending the awards. Bravo!
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