U.S. — In a groundbreaking study conducted by the Institute of Essential Masculinity, researchers have discovered that the key to a man’s happiness is a simple yet effective solution: regular flyovers by the iconic A-10 Warthog.
“Forget therapy, forget expensive hobbies, all you need is the sweet sound of freedom roaring overhead,” Lead researcher, Dr. Chuck “Maverick” Thompson, explained. “After years of rigorous research involving thousands of men from all walks of life, we can confidently say that the happiness quotient of any man can be significantly boosted by the unmistakable sound of an A-10 Warthog tearing through the sky with its 30mm Vulcan blazing.”
“BRRRRRRRRRRRT!” he added.
Participants in the study reported an average increase of 87% in happiness level whenever an A-10 made its presence known. One respondent commented, “I could be stuck in the worst traffic jam, but if an A-10 suddenly swooped down, I’d forget all my problems. It’s like instant therapy, but louder and with more explosions — well, imaginary explosions, but still.”
The study also revealed that the A-10’s distinctive appearance plays a crucial role in its happiness-inducing effects. Dr. Thompson elaborated, “The rugged, no-nonsense design of the Warthog triggers a primal response in men. It’s like seeing the superhero of planes — Batman with wings and a Gatling gun. I can literally feel my testosterone levels rise.”
At publishing time, it was reported that a man who saw a massive A-10 Warthog thunder overhead at the same time as an old M4 Sherman tank drove by immediately died of happiness.
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