The ghost and fighting spirit of old Sam Walton is alive and well as leadership at Sam’s Club declares total war on retail rival and arch nemesis, Costco! Sam’s Club proudly proclaims, “say hello to my little friend!” as they whip out cost savings for the customer only a drug dealer could come up with. What cost savings, you ask? $1.38 for a hotdog and a fountain drink! What?! Say again?! Is 1995 back?! You bet your ass 1995 is back!
In shock, Costco has yet to respond. They may think $1.50 is a steal for their own hot dog combo, but they fail to recognize how secretly cheap and stingy everyone actually is (including myself). Sam’s Club knows us well. They’re owned by Walmart, a company that’s been studying our propensity towards the illusion of savings for decades.
With such a devastating shot across the bow, how will Costco respond to Sam’s Club? $0.15 single chicken nuggets? $0.75 pizza and brownie combo, ranch dressing not included? A Costco mascot that randomly films pranks inside of Sam’s Club stores for viral content?
Whatever happens next, may the odds ever be in your favor and let the wiener wars begin!
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